I've been thinking about these damn blogs.
How they can be used in hurtful manners, and turn black on you. How they can be used to hurt someone you care about.
If you care about someone, you don't write something that you would be ashamed to have them see, if it isn't meant for them, if it's just to vent, keep it priviate. it's not always something the world needs to read.
I can speak from personal experience that it's not always a good idea to just assume someone can't or wont see the shit that you say about them.
You know who you are, and I'm not trying to piss you off or hurt you. But maybe you should apologize, because I remember once upon a time when I wrote a blog with some damn hurtful things about you in it, and we wouldn't be friends today if I hadn't apologized. I know she can sometimes be hard to handle, but she is your best friend. and she didn't deserve such a pointed, public attack. Just think about it, kay? You are a sweet person, and I know you'll do what's right once you have a chance to calm down.
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I did apologize, for the unnecessary stuff. The one about her walk and girlfriend were irrelevant to the situation - and I told her so.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm not going to apologize for being honest. And I told her this. I'm going to be honest, most of what I said was true. Most of it - we all have things about each other that frustrate us, and she has on occasion told me such a thing. I don't see anything wrong with not lying - after all, she's one of those people that values the truth above everything else. Coming from that standpoint, I'm not ashamed of it. I'm sad that what I said hurt her, and irritated that others have to be part of something that's none of their business, but as for the actual act of writing everything, I'm not ashamed. I'm not proud, but I still didn't do anything any one of us haven't done in the past.
And what's the difference between this and a myspace blog? Or a poem, which has direct implications of a dedication? Or an angry status message, which publicly declares anger? I have three followers here. Myspace? Hundreds of friends. Yeah, I realize she could have seen it. I wasn't expecting complete anonymity.
It's even pointless to mention it here, because it's just going to fuel more emotion: but she has, in fact, said hurtful things about someone's physical traits. I know you probably don't care, but Kyle has, on more than one occasion, been offended by comments she has made about, surprise surprise, his feet. It's something he can't help, but it didn't matter then, did it? And now it suddenly does, because she's on the receiving end. Go figure.
That's irrelevant, though. I appreciate your interest in reconciliation, Cassie, but it's not up to you. It's not even up to me anymore. I said what I had to say in response to the letter she sent me - I'm not going to grovel, or crawl on my knees, to make her like me again. If she really thinks that this is the person I'm changing into, that's completely her right. And I told her that. I'm not a shitty person for lashing out - I have enough confidence in myself to realize that, though it may have been a mistake, I'm not the low, weak person she now tells me I am. She can think, and do, whatever the hell she wants. And so can you, from here. I'm sure this isn't going to be received well, and I'm sure she'll end up seeing it too.
But thanks for your opinion. I can always count on you to be honest about it.
* such a thing about me, which hurt me.
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